Welcome to Friday Fictioneers! As this is National Haiku Writing Month, I am writing a haibun today. As you may know, a haibun combines prose (often fiction or travel diary) and haiku.
This week’s photo prompt is provided by fellow writer Sandra Crook. Thank you, Sandra!
For more information on Friday Fictioneers, or to learn how to post your own story, check out our fearless leader’s website, Rochelle Wisoff-Field’s Addicted to Purple.
How to Tell Time
by Jan Brown
1995
8:15 a.m. Just enough time to check her make-up before the meeting. A high visibility project!
2000
8:20 a.m. Printing the last set of handouts. She’s glad to be leading the conference this time.
2005
8:25 a.m. Running late. Wishes she wasn’t leading the conference this time.
2010
8:30 a.m. Her flight’s delayed—missing the first two hours of the corporate retreat.
2015
8:35 a.m. A rare vacation day. Wasted on doctor’s appointments and tests.
2016
8:40 a.m. Her executive assistant asks what’s wrong.
~~~~~~~~~~~~
her favorite dress
how he used to zip the back
now the funeral
~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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Oh, this is wonderfully imaginative, although quite foreboding. I love how time just slips away in this, minutes and years all at once. So well done!
Thank you, Lorrie! I’m glad the haibun resonated with you. Time can definitely slip away from us.
I hope she made time along the way for family, friends, vacations, etc.
Loved the haibun format.
Thank you, Russell. Drawing from my own experience, I’d say she made too little time for her own life, and devoted too much to her corporate life (using the term “life” somewhat loosely here).
Dear Jan,
Unusual structure and very well done. You never cease to amaze me. (I miss you when you’re gone).
Shalom,
Rochelle
Thank you for the kind comment, and thank you for missing me 😊
Clever, loved the format!
Thank you, Alistair!
Very original format and I like the story too. Well done.
My very first haibun. How we learn.
And so time has its day.
Thank you, Patrick.
Good to see a different style of writing. Sadness portrayed in a haiku, and the proses lead you straight to it. Well done.
I really love haibun… We do have a haibun Monday every second week at dVerse… Really like the timeline of success being failure, so very sad…
Thank you, Bjorn. I’ve been meaning to check out dVerse…of course my excuse is lack of time. Ironic, given our topic here 😬
So clever how you did this, Jan. The way you captured this in a timeline to show her progress. She got to “success” but couldn’t enjoy it in the end. The haiku about the dress is so sad, says so much! Very well done.
Thank you so much, Amy.
Very cleverly done, and so true to life. An existence ruled by time.
Thank you, Sandra!
Beautiful, true to life and then sad. Nicely done, Jan.
Thank you, Erin!
Beautiful and sad. I too love the format, and the haiku in the end really nails it.
Thank you very much. I’m glad you enjoyed the format.
You did a wonderful job with this. Time is fleeting.
Thank you very much.
Nice one Jan.
Thank you, Dawn!
A poignant way of marking the passing of years and of her love.
Thank you, Liz.
It doesn’t seem that time was kind to her, or was it rather that she wasn’t kind to herself over the course of her life? Too little time spent on herself and too much on the less meaningful things.
You are right about that. Too many people, myself included, get lost along the way.
I think hers is a common story, sadly. I love how you structured this. Very effective.
Thank you, Margaret!
Wow… this is so well written.. how time fades and that haiku at the end…. tragically beautiful!
Thank you, Lori. I appreciate the kind comments. I’m glad the haiku also resonated with you. I actually wrote that first. The story came later.
My pleasure, Jan 🙂 Sometimes writing the ending brings about a beginning.. happens to me often 🙂 Have a great weekend!