Watching the garden grow

It’s time for the Friday Fictioneers! Each week, Madison Woods posts a photo prompt, and flash fiction writers around the world submit 100-word stories in response. You can read the other submissions this week via the link at the end of my story.  There is also a Facebook Page for Friday Fictioneers.

We moved to Wisconsin to enjoy country life. Our “back yard” was a lush, green meadow. Our garden was the width of a football field, filled with tomatoes, cucumbers and corn, bordered by the sweetest of end zones: strawberries on one side and raspberries on the other.

I didn’t have a chance to tend the garden last year, what with all the trips to the doctor, hospital, hospice and, finally, the funeral home. I can see the raspberry bushes starting to become a thorny bramble, but all I can do now is hover over them and watch them self-destruct.

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39 thoughts on “Watching the garden grow

  1. You start of so innocently and happy. Life in the country, what could be better. And then life itself,intrudes and the dreams are left to tangle and get thorny, possibly past the point of no return.

    A very sad ending but poignant and beautiful as well.

  2. I’m thinking….how lucky to have that wonderful football field of plenty in your backyard…then to be hit with sadness, grief and darkness. Life does that…turns things upside down. Lovely writing. I’m on the list.

  3. Extremely powerful last line. I loved the whole second paragraph. I do think that some punctuation/minor word changes could strengthen the first paragraph and I would definitely suggest pulling out the quotation marks from around “back yard.” They aren’t necessary because the backyard is actually being described. With the quotes, you’re basically telling people that it isn’t quite the perfect definition for the space, so depending on how much they read into that fact, they may be disappointed to learn the “back yard,” although large, is grass, flowers, and plants (which they’d probably expect any backyard to consist of).

    Mines at http://plowright.wordpress.com/2012/06/29/fictioneers-19/ 🙂

  4. My story starts out with the “country life” but doesn’t end on such a sad note. I enjoyed the parallel between her (?) life and the lifespan of the berries…life is berries with a few thorns – most of the time – unfortunately the thorns sometimes outnumber the sweetness.

    ~Susan (www.susanwenzel.com)

  5. That was so well done, and so recognizable and people might think it’s easy to convey such truths, but it’s not. You did so. Having been there on occasion, I hope you’ll find your way clear of the thorns soon.

  6. Hi Jan, your story sounds very realistic. An interesting thing I felt while reading it is how nature has a way of bringing about the results She wants with or without our assistance, so in that respect all is not lost. Except our own sense of control, that is.

    • Thank you, Madison! Very much appreciate your review. You are so right, that the thing we mere mortals lose is our sense of control. Thank you for the comments, and have a great weekend!

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